The title of her book seems a bit strange but when you look further, you know Leila Benelli is right on track. Living with

Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder (ADHD) and a son who also suffers the same, Benelli, who’s South-African, spent six years researching the disorder and now offers solutions to parents so they can deal with the problems head on. M&B grabs the opportunity to interact with the reporter/ author/mum who passionately works towards creating more awareness about ADHD and talks about her book Help! My child is driving me crazy.

WHAT HAS BEEN YOUR EXPERIENCE DEALING WITH ADHD?
It’s been a long road of trials and error. That’s why my book is called Help! My child is driving me crazy because I literally felt like I’m going crazy and I can’t do this anymore. We all want to do what’s best for our kids. So, my research really got me to the point where I’m like, ‘Oh, I now understand how my child thinks’. Besides ADHD, my son Umr has sensory integration as well. Which means the outside senses don’t receive information the same way everybody else receives information. For example, your skin is one of your senses, so when you touch the other person, you know how soft or hard to touch because your senses tell you that if you squeeze, it’s too hard. In his case, he needs more impact. He means to touch, but he squeezes. Instead of a pat, he’ll give you a whack. So, what happens in an everyday life situation is that his brother would come and complain ‘ Mommy, my brother hit me again’. When I would confront Umr, he would say, ‘ I didn’t hit him, I just touched him’. That would always be his answer. I never understood why he was such a bully. Then I learnt about sensory integration and I realised he’s not lying; he senses that he’s only touching but his brother is feeling a whack. I had to explain to my son that the way your body tells you information is different to the way your brother receives it. So, before you touch your brother, stop and then touch. It still happens because he is impulsive. But now his brother understands and he runs when he sees Umr coming or he’ll remind him. So, you know how this action can cause a low self esteem because in his mind, he is not doing anything wrong but everybody else tells him he is bad.

WHAT BROUGHT YOU TO INDIA?
I was in China for a global entrepreneurial network group meeting and I met people from India. It was an impulsive decision to come here. Agnello Rajesh of St Angelo’s Computers heard about what I do, he, sort of, identified with my work and asked me to come to India to give some coaching. He felt parents here would love to know about my book and learn from me. I anyway wanted to come and experience India so I thought I could also be of some service. It’s been amazing so far. I have spoken at least on one or two seminars a day, at schools over the last two weeks I have been here. I was also part of a panel discussion, which included doctors and actress turned child educator Swaroop Sampat-Rawal, who also wrote a book called Learning disabilities in a nutshell. We spoke about our books and interacted with over 500 plus parents. Besides parents, I have also trained teachers on ADHD.

WAS UMR’S CONDITION THE ONLY REASON FOR YOU TO RESEARCH EXTENSIVELY ON ADHD?
Over the last 10 years, I have been very interested in child and adult behaviour, observing how we interact as adults and how children react. When my other son was diagnosed with ADHD, my interest went in the direction of ADHD and I realised that some of the symptoms were symptoms that I had as a child, and there are certain things that I still struggle with. Then I decided to take my research in the direction specifically. I have had a panel of medical experts support my work like neurologists, psychologists, psychiatrists, occupational therapists, because it is such a vast area of interest. ADHD cannot be treated by one medical professional alone.

One has to take a multi-disciplinary approach. So, my research took me in many different fields and I worked extensively with these medical experts and we are working hand in hand to come up with practical solutions. The doctors have all the medical information, but how they put it across doesn’t always make sense to the parent. I think that’s where I bridge the gap between parents and medical experts, I take information from the medical experts and work it in such a way that it’s practical for parents to apply in everyday life situation. And it’s been very successful. Parents have been very open . I have used the information in a particular way and written the book,, I have also hosted live talk shows and produced a DVD and audio CD where I interview medical experts asking basic questions so parents can get most of their questions answered. ADHD people don’t like reading much so therefore, an audio or a DVD really works.